i registered for the test back in august and signed up for the test site in seoul. apparently, it's quite common for koreans and foreigners to take the test here because many want to attend graduate schools in america. the test was scheduled for a 10am start, and because it takes me approximately two hours to get from sinchang to seoul, dad was kind enough to book a hotel for me close to the center.
so on a friday after school, i walked downtown, got a latte, and got on the slow train to seoul. at seoul station i transferred to the subway for two stops and got off near my hotel. i had printed directions, but the route i was supposed to take was blocked by construction. i found a way around it and easily found the fulbright center where i'd be testing the next morning. finding my hotel from there was also easy. it was a swanky place. with revolving doors, and a valet, and marble everything, and clacking heels. i walked in with my back pack and tennis shoes and alaska crewneck. i guess i couldn't press the elevator button myself because there was someone there to do that too. the room had an amazing view of the street below and the lights and the cars passing. i ate dinner in my room and took a long shower and ate the lucky chocolate my co-teachers had surprised me with (i couldn't share with anyone, it's bad luck, i wasn't complaining). i lounged in bed, watching the matrix and men's volleyball on tv, and reviewing vocab.
the next morning i woke up to rain and the sound of traffic. i got dressed and repacked and took the elevator back down. i returned my key and checked my backpack because i couldn't take my cell phone into the test center. i ate a healthy meal of mcdonalds and a latte for breakfast and walked through the rain to the center.
i was super early, but i had to be shown to my "G" room because it was in the basement in the back, back, back corner of the building. i was number 4 to go in and begin the test. there were soundproof headphones, which i was the only one to wear (i thought that strange, but i didn't want to hear other people clicking, it helps me center). i plowed through the odd hours of the test and came out a victor on the other side. i got my unofficial scores, sent them to four schools, and had to wait for my essay score. (i just got that yesterday, also good!)
i then took the subway one stop to a transfer, went the wrong way, had to turn around, eventually ended up in sinchon. i met meg for some coffee and we waiting for my co-teachers to show up (we met them at on the border for celebratory mexican, because they were in seoul for the wedding of two teachers at our school).
all-in-all, everything went smoothly. God was there, calming me, soothing me. i felt confident and sure. despite the horrors of the week before and the week after, in that moment, i was feeling good. which i am so grateful for, because in the face of it all, it could've been a complete disaster. but i made it, alone, and with Him.
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*i missed the days when M and i would drive each other to our big tests and wait. i missed not having to worry about transportation or where i was going to put my phone. i missed having something there to mitigate my worries and my fears. i missed knowing i had someone waiting for me on the other side. but in Seoul, i was alone. before, and after. but it made me more reliant on his calming presence and my prayers were fervent the entire time. so thankful.
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